here forever always now

From the Same Womb

by Mishka Straka



We all came from the same womb.
We all slept in the same room.
We all face the same doom.
We all breathe in the same gloom.

There's a line between us that’s been drawn
Between a sunny day and the grey dawn
Some days I feel like a tree being sawn
I see you lying there but you're all ready gone.


Out to the winter and the crusty snow
Falling through the ice to the murky depths below
Grasping for life that’s been swirled away
Doubting that redemption is really on its way

We all come from the same womb
We all slept in the same room
You all face the same doom
We all breathe in the same gloom

Now the TV’s on but ain’t nobody viewing
We’re getting fucked without the screwing
When you get to the end and look back
Do you say to yourself what was I doing

There was so much distance between all of us
There's more to say but inside I feel vacuous
There's so many things I'm not comprehending
Why you fall and I'm the last brother standing

We all came from the same womb
We all slept in the same room
We all subscribe to the same doom
We all breathe in the same bloom.

Anyway it helped me feel better, even if it's more Nirvana than a Buddhist
lullabye, I had to dump that bucket from the inner well.

And as you may know, booze is one hell of a cesspool to climb out of. Now that I've seen first hand the grizzly results of alcoholism, I know that it’s true that it affects far more than the poor individuals who scramble their souls in the dark labyrinth where booze takes them.

KultureKampf

Mein Kampf = My Struggle

Just finished reading my life among the Deathworks by Philip Reif - the first of a supposed triology. I hoped he already wrote them as I discovered he passed away on 7/11/2006 at the age of 83. Mere days after I finished reading it. Its a sociological theory as an extension of Frued's psychoanalysis and Nietzsche's the Gay Science(wherein he declares "God is Dead").

It's rather thick reading, but the distillations are:
First world/Culture: paganism - rooted in fate
Second World/Culture: monotheism - rooted in faith
Third World/Culture: theraputic man - rooted in fiction

the concept of Deathworks: Art and literature that are the realization of man's chaotic and repressed nature - works that transgress the current culture in order to obtain freedom from the Vertical in Authority (the power structure) of the previous culture. It is the deconstruction of the sacred in a creative and self-fictive revelation of the Primacy of Possibilities (his terms) - the stability of the social order.

Or something like that. Like I said, "It's thick."

Also ripped through a first time novel: the Best people in the World - a coming of age story in the 1970's. Terry and Adam have recommended another: Somebody Moore (not Alan or Terry) which I will digest once I conclude the history of Dust. the small and invisible. Also listening to two books on tape. The first: The Great Raid (rescuing the lost souls from Corrigidor and Bataan - phillipines POW camp in WWII) and now the Theory of Consciousness a series of lectures by a John Searle.

Television: PBS - last of three part series on the elegant universe. From string theory to Membranes and 11 dimensions. How to study the invisible. when does theory become science. how to reconcile anomolies that refute the basic unifying principles. blackholes, dark matter, stellar quarks; sparkles, neuons, gravitons: quantum dust.

Saw a Scanner Darkly over the weekend. PKD short story about addiction and surveillence in the future. who is feeding whom. who stands to profit from the addiction. how to curtail advancing numbers of addicts. how to control, reprogram or passify the "sick" Truth Is stranger then Fiction

disaster comes in threes

battling a heat wave - boo boo succombs to a mysterious ailment with no discernable cause. fever of unknown origin. we think she ate something that disagreed with her tum tum.
suprising considering that she can devour organic and inorganic objects alike. so she has been through the vet gauntlet to the tune of $500.

fell off the ladder trying to get a birds nest out of the downspout. no injuries, but a tore down half the gutter breaking my fall. new gutters: $950.
no trauma to the back: priceless.

18th anniversay is porcelin. new teeth: $2500 - going broke: costly

but we press on with search for new diggs. pete's buddy has a house on teahen road in brighton that we check out thius weekend.

put new strings on the classical guitar. still haven't brought myself to plug in the keyboard??!

tour de france inspires me to put air in the tires of my bike. next step, to actually ride more than three blocks.

reunion is this weekend. Farmington founders fest and Ann Arbor art fairs this week.

listened to two new books and read three more.
the old ace in the hole - anne proulex
the great raid - rescuing the lost souls of bataan and corrigador (WWII POW camp in phillipines)

my life with the deathworks - non fiction

the best people in the world - fiction

francis crick - biography

documentaries: "searching for wrong eyed jesus" alt.country from the lousiana bayou and hill country of tennessee

mom back in time for birthday and reunion.

'nother year older...

And Deeper in Debt!

finally got some tags for boo boo. still need new gutters ($1000) and nice wrought iron fence ($3000) and then put the crib up for sale. meanwhile: teeth to get fixed today ($2000) - clean out the garage, reduce storage rental from 20 x 20 to 20 x 10, have a garage sale next week.

spent the 11th celebrating good times with my beautiful wife cynthia.

had a suprise visit from gary koivunen and karen from portland. hung with the K-clan and larry the G-man - played some quantum vollyball, told stories, drank cheap wine, smoked rope and cloves, ate cake and pie.

picked up some new books and old music from the library.

the world cup has come and gone.

wimbeldon 06 is history

tour de france 06 is in full swing

reunions (family this month) (30th high school in november) abound

mom turns 80 in august, dennis and family in town!

work is uncommonly low key and good.

talked with terry lauer this week - berkley front reunion this friday

need to lose a few pounds and shed some inhibitions.

paid vacations are an oxymoron

i am just a moron